


What the heart wants

by 4AlarmFirecracker



Category: DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV)
Genre: Angst, Canon Compliant, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Established Relationship, F/F, Fluff, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-02
Updated: 2020-01-02
Packaged: 2021-02-27 06:33:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22052581
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/4AlarmFirecracker/pseuds/4AlarmFirecracker
Summary: The one where Sara's birthday was always overshadowed by Christmas but Ava makes sure it never happens again and makes Sara feel special on that day.
Relationships: Sara Lance/Ava Sharpe
Comments: 6
Kudos: 164
Collections: Avalance 4ever 2019 holiday exchange





	What the heart wants

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ShipsAreSparksOfLife](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShipsAreSparksOfLife/gifts).



> This is a gift for @iurey for the secret Santa of the Avalance discord ♥ (https://discord.gg/Shnj6x9)  
> Angsty and fluffy. I hope you will like it ;) 
> 
> Thank you so much to @WardenRoot for beta reading the mess I'm writing.

[Join the Avalance Discord.](https://discord.gg/Shnj6x9%22)

Here she was, on the Waverider, late on Christmas Eve, laying on the couch in the safety of Ava’s arms. Her team had just saved time again, with the help of the Time Bureau, and they were rewarding themselves for the hard work with popcorn and a movie.

To be honest, Sara was not paying much attention to the movie. But how could she, when her head was on her girlfriend’s upper chest and her ear pressed against her beating heart? She was toying with the fabric of Ava’s top, her fingers tracing lazy patterns with her thumb. Her stomach fluttered and warmth overwhelmed her when Ava passed her hand in her hair, scratching her head. Sara almost purred at the action, but stopped herself, regaining control of her body.

But something was staining this perfect moment. Tomorrow was Sara's birthday. Falling on the same day as Christmas, it had been overshadowed for as long as her memory stretched. And Sara could not get out of her head that it would be forgotten again, this year. To be fair, she had never told the day of her birthday to her teammates. But how could she, when she was certain they would be so engrossed in the holiday spirit, that they would probably forget.

Thoughts were mixing up in her head. On one side, she did not need people to celebrate her birthday, celebrating Christmas with them was sufficient. On the other side, she yearned to celebrate her birthday. She wanted it all. The gifts — not just ones exchanged at Christmas, but gifts given to her for her special day — along with a meal to celebrate her, and everything else that accompanies normal people's birthdays.

To add to her conflicting mood, she had spotted her team talking behind her back. She was sure of it. Because every time she had entered a room the past few hours, they had stopped talking immediately. She tensed for a second in Ava’s arms and clenched her jaw. Fatigue was starting to settle as Ava’s finger traced the side of her neck. Would Ava notice her heart racing in her veins and beating loudly in her ears?

Moreover, her crew had told her they would do Christmas at midday and not in the evening like the previous years. Ray and Nora were especially thrilled at that idea and at the prospect of spending the Christmas evening just by themselves.

Sara had suppressed a growl at the sight of the two lovebirds. She had leaned back against the chair back, arms crossed, and looked away. Was she a little jealous of their affection towards each other? No. Probably not. But she was not the first to show PDA to everyone around them. She liked her privacy.

Zari and Charlie had also pushed in Ray and Nora’s way, in a more refined and less obvious way. She would bet Ava any day that they would hook up soon, if not on that evening. Even though they weren’t officially a couple, Sara knew her team well. Something had definitely happened there, or soon would.

Sara took a deep breath, closed her eyes, and let herself be lulled by Ava’s even breath. Tomorrow would be another day. Not the easiest, but she was still looking forward to spending time with Ava and her crew. Even Gary would come.

***

“Captain.” Gideon’s voice filled Sara’s room. She had just finished tidying it and was resting on her bed, eyes closed. She had been enjoying the calm, her crew’s distant excited screams muffled by the thick walls.

“Captain?” Gideon called her again.

Sara groaned, but opened her eyes and sat on the side of her bed. “What is it, Gideon?” The tip of her fingers scratched the back of her neck, trying to loosen the knot that had formed there an hour ago.

“Ava just arrived on the bridge. Agent Green is there too.”

Sara jumped on her feet, bouncing from one to the other while softening the fabric of her black shirt. She had chosen to go casual but still classy this afternoon. She quickly checked herself in the mirror, putting back a lock of hair that was out of place, and noticing the wide grin harboring her face. Good. The subtle gloss was still on as she smacked her lips. Her chest was light and she was a little out of breath. It was the first Christmas she would spend with her girlfriend. She checked the clock: 1 pm. Right on time, as always.

When she walked onto the bridge, she immediately spotted Ava. She had a blue turtle neck on and wore high-waisted pants, with a belt outlining her waist. Sara ran her tongue on her bottom lip, then trapped it between her teeth when Ava looked at her, mouth slightly opened.

“You look amazing,” Ava said, moving closer to Sara.

Sara scoffed, looking at her own clothes. “Nothing fancy. But you… look splendid,” Sara said, looking Ava up and down for several seconds. “Come here.”

Ava moved to meet her, ready to kiss her. Sara’s heartbeat sped up when she felt Ava’s warm breath on her lips. She closed her eyes but nothing came. She opened them back, disconcerted. She was ready to ask Ava what had happened, but she followed her gaze and fell on Gary’s idiotic grin, less than a meter away from them. She groaned and rolled her eyes. He never respected personal boundaries. Sara was sure he wanted them to kiss, but she knew that Ava wasn’t comfortable enough to do it in front of her employee, yet.

***

Sara was watching her crew sharing stories, laughs, and food in front of her. She was truly happy for them. Really. She had been having fun with them. Ava even fit well in, and she had praised the effort Sara's team had made with their Christmas tree. They had drank wonderful cocktails Charlie had made at the aperitif and ate mini pizzas. But there had been an exchange of gifts and not a single one had been for her birthday. What did she expect? People to know something she had never said? Delusional. That’s what she was.

She had to admit that the well-defined dagger she had received from Ava had been a hit with her. She loved her blades and could recognize a good one. On her side, she had given Ava a Beebo plush, a throwback to their first mission together, the day her eyes lit up when she heard that Ava was not the husband kind, that she might have a chance with her. Sure, she had first thought of a three nights stand, not more. But she caught feelings, and now, she could not imagine her life without Ava.

Sara looked at her plate, remembering when she had tried to make Ava think she had prepared it on her own, while knowing perfectly that Ava would know that she had asked Gideon to fabricate it and prepare the entirety of the meal.

She was having fun, true. But she was still disappointed Ava did not wish her a happy birthday. She clenched her fists under the table, flattening her hands on her pants a second later, trying to calm herself down. That’s when she felt Ava lay a hand on her thigh, her eyes asking her if everything was okay. She nodded, her hand going over Ava’s, squeezing it. But she was sad that almost everyone was in the Christmas mood and all she could think about was why they did not think of her birthday. Her heart was racing, despite her even breathing and calm exterior. Did Ava even know when she was born? It had been less than a year that they had been together. Sara knew she read her file, but she could not have remembered or even cared about her birthday at that time. Could she?

Sara could feel herself becoming lightheaded, as if all the oxygen was leaving her brain, exactly as if she were on a boat. God, she hated boats. She knew she would start to have clammy hands and feel oppressed. She had to get out of there. The sounds of laughing and demonstration of affection from Nora, Ray, Charlie, and Zari were too much for her. She wanted space. No. She needed space. She removed Ava’s hand from her thigh and got up, catching a look of worry in Ava’s eyes. She could not deal with it now. Not when she could barely breathe.

“I’m sorry,” Sara muttered to Ava, before leaving the room, all her teammates’ eyes on her. Silence finally took place at the table.

She needed to calm down. If she did not communicate her birthday date with Ava and her team, she could not expect them to understand. But a thought passed in her mind as she opened the door to her room. Why was no one following her? God, she hated that she was craving attention. She was not like that usually. She jumped on her bed, face buried in her pillow. She waited a minute, maybe two, before she heard a knock on the door. But she did not answer. A time portal opened up just before her eyes, Ava appearing right in front of her.

“Do you always have a time courrier on you?” Sara said, blaming Ava for always thinking of work. Sara felt sorry for Ava the moment she saw the look of hurt in her eyes. But she would not take back what she said. Her pride was too strong.

Ava clenched her jaw. She took a step towards the bed. “What happened back there, Sara?” A pause. She sat at the edge of the bed. “We were spending a nice afternoon, and then you stormed away.” Ava took Sara’s trembling hand in hers, sending a rush of warmth through her. But the touch also seemed to burn her.

“Were we really?” Sara removed her hand abruptly from Ava’s, hurting her, again. It was the day.

“I was. I thought you were too.” Ava got up and turned her back on her. Was she trying to hide the emotions on her face? Sara knew she would always disappoint Ava. She was not the right woman for Ava, who was too good for her childish behavior. “I can’t help you if you don’t tell me what’s wrong, Sara,” Ava said softly and turned her back to her, but not before Sara spotted the tears in her eyes. And Sara felt guilty. She had been spending a nice afternoon with everyone. “A relationship is based on communication.”

“No one wished me a happy birthday!” Sara yelled. It took everything for Sara to say it, and now she felt like a spoiled brat. Her cheek flushed, warming her entire face. She was sure that even her ears would turn red. She sunk deeper into the mattress, trying to make herself as small as possible. Sara looked at the door, ready to run if needed. But then Ava smiled, looking at her lovingly.

“Why are you smiling?” Sara asked, stunned by Ava’s reaction.

“You storming out of the end of the dinner is only for that?”

“Only?” Sara scoffed and shook her head.

Ava moved forward again and took Sara’s hand gently, a smile still plastered on her face. Sara was tempted to remove her hand, but she waited for Ava to explain why she was like that.

“Close your eyes,” Ava said, as her hand squeezed Sara’s shoulder.

“Close my … why?”

“Please, babe. Close them.” Sara closed her eyes as Ava's hand tenderly made contact with her cheek.

The sound of a time portal opening reached Sara’s ears as she was being guided by Ava through it, or so it seemed. What was happening? Where was Ava leading them? Why had she reacted like that at her confession?

“Open your eyes.”

They were in Ava’s apartment. Sara startled as a sudden noise filled the room. Party whistles. That’s when she saw all her friends in front of her, Gary included.

“Happy birthday!” all of them screamed. They were all here, smiling at her. Banners were hanging above them.

A weight had been lifted from Sara’s shoulders. She could not believe what she was seeing. They wanted to make her a surprise party. She felt dumb for reacting like she had earlier. Her hands flew to rest above her heart as she tried not to tear up. It had been an emotional two days. That’s when Ava brought her close to her chest, a hand in her hair. Sara returned the hug, finally at ease. She embraced Ava strongly, not afraid in the slightest of hurting her. Ava was robust, she could take it.

Ava had planned this for her. She knew her birthday. She cared about her. More than Sara imagined. Sara hid her face in Ava’s clothes, the warmth emanating from Ava soothing her.

“Thank you,” she whispered.

She was not sure that Ava had heard it until she felt a hand in her hair and soft lips on her forehead. She almost melted on the spot, leaning into the kiss, smiling.

“I’m sorry, Ava, for earlier. I didn’t know,” Sara said, distancing herself from Ava a little bit to look at her. Nonetheless, she did not break the contact.

“It’s fine, love. You couldn’t have known.”

As Ava’s hands framed her face, Sara pushed on her toes to meet Ava halfway. She stopped an inch away from tasting Ava’s lips. Their breaths mingled, Sara enjoying the closeness and anticipating the moment. Her hands then came to rest on Ava’s waist and neck, using the latter to pull herself closer, and, finally, she closed the gap. As Sara’s lips caressed Ava’s soft ones, a surging tide of warmth overtook her, her fingers digging into Ava’s skin. A small gasp came from Ava as Sara’s body searched to remove any space left between them, their breasts pressing against each other. Her heart beat faster and faster. Butterflies blossomed into Sara’s stomach as Ava took her bottom lip between her teeth and tugged at it, her tongue then soothing the welcomed pain.

Sara felt a rush of palpitations take over her body. She had kissed Ava softly at first, but then, the intensity had taken over. She clang to Ava as a rock during a storm, her insistent mouth eagerly parting Ava’s shaking lips.

She came back to reality when she heard yells of encouragement. Oh, God. She had forgotten for a moment that they were kissing in front of her team. She sucked one last time on Ava’s bottom lip, ending the kiss with a plopping sound. She then looked at Ava, whose eyes were glossy, matching her disheveled look and open mouth. She seemed like she had not even noticed the others yet. When Ava did, her cheeks reddened. She removed her hands from Sara as fast as possible, cleared her throat, and scratched the back of her neck, her eyes glued to the floor.

“You’re cute,” Sara said, dropping a quick kiss on Ava’s nose.

“Get the girl, Sara!” Charlie yelled.

Everyone laughed at that comment, Sara and Ava included. Everyone except Zari. She looked at Charlie, took her by the lapels of her jacket, and to Charlie’s greatest surprise, kissed her. Sara looked at Ava, and the two shared a knowing look.

Sara looked fully at the place. It had been arranged with more couches than usual to accommodate for everyone.

“Come on,” Ava said, leading her to one of them. Gifts were seated proudly on the low table, ready for her to open them. She crossed eyes with Ava, silently thanking her again.

***

Sara checked herself in the mirror. The purple suit that Ava had given her fit her perfectly. She had had a great afternoon and received amazing gifts.

Ray had given her a smartwatch, tracking her sleep patterns and allowing her to exercise with it too. Bonus point, It allowed her to create a time portal so she could alternate between Ava’s place and the Waverider. To that, Sara and Ava had both kept silent. Sara had imagined for a second to live with Ava in her apartment.

Nora had gifted her a weighted blanket, so she could sleep better. Indeed, she sometimes still woke up in the middle of the night, her past following her to this day. When she spent the night with Ava, it was easier. But she wasn’t always there.

Mick had first given her some lighters. She had not understood why until he had told her she could burn his real gift if she hated it. That is when he had given her a copy of his newest novel, the follow up of Uncaged Desire, and she had asked him if it existed in audiobook.

She had received beers from all around the world from Charlie, and some video games from Zari, who had asked her to promise to play some of them with her.

Nate had given her two mugs. One which said, “History? I not only know it, but I also lived it.” and the other one made her laugh loudly as Ava had read it, being seemingly jealous. It said “Bi-ing my way through history.”

The funniest gift, though, had come from Gary. He had offered both Sara and Ava a t-shirt. Sara’s said, “My girlfriend is a smart ass.” and Ava’s one said, “My girlfriend has a great ass.” He shipped them too much for Sara’s own liking, but she liked it nonetheless.

Ava had told her that she would give her her gift later and had asked her to put on what was on the bed. Was this the gift? If it was, she really liked it. Ava did know her pretty well. But why was she dressed like that? What was the surprise? Would they go to eat at a restaurant?

When she walked down the stairs, her friends were still partying. She waited right beside them for Ava. She was not there yet, but she had told her that she also had to change.

Sara did not have to wait long. Indeed, 5 minutes later, the sound of heels reverberated on the walls. That’s when she saw Ava. She opened her mouth for a split second, not knowing what to say. She was not speechless usually, but the sight in front of her was mesmerizing. She was in a white suit sat perfectly on her body. She was not used to seeing her all in white, but it was a nice sight. The jacket was slightly open, emphasizing her breasts and highlighting her long, soft neck.

She muttered under her breath, “What I wouldn’t give to kiss that neck right now.”

“What did you say?” Ava asked as she walked down on the last step of the stairs.

“You look amazing,” Sara answered.

“You don’t look so bad yourself,” Ava said, smiling. Sara made her think she was offended by making a face but then smiled too.

Ava went to the living room to talk to Sara’s team. “Clean everything up by 10 pm. When I get back, I don’t want to see you here, ok?” Charlie looked at Zari, understanding very well what Ava meant by that. “And Rory?”

“Yes, Misses Captain?”

Ava rolled her eyes. “Try not to set anything on fire.”

To that, everyone laughed, and Ray promised her they would clean and keep her house in one piece.

Sara looked one last time at her family, happy to have them in her life. Nora and Ray were all over each other, while Zari and Charlie were already playing a video game Sara had just been given.

“Let’s go, hun,” Ava said, offering her arm to Sara, and opening a portal.

***

They arrived in an alley. Sara did not know at all where they were or were going. Ava led her to the front door of a restaurant called “La belle époque”.

A minute later, they were already seated at a table, looking at the menu.

“How did you get a reservation?” Sara asked Ava. “You have to book at least 6 months in advance to get a table.”

To that, Ava gave her a simple look that said everything.

“Cheeky!” Sara said. Cheeky of Ava to think they would still be together 6 months later, not even 2 months in their relationship. Sara could not believe that Ava had known the date of her birthday for months.

“You’re amazing,” Sara said, making Ava blush a little bit. She loved when she had that effect on Ava. She was not that strict Time Bureau agent anymore. But had that been an act, or had she changed since they had met? Or maybe a little bit of both?

***

They had a nice dinner, but just before the dessert, the waiter came in front of her and left quite a big box on the table.

“Wait … I thought my gift was the suit. Then I thought it was the restaurant. But it’s not?” Sara could not believe her eyes. Ava was too good to be true.

“Let’s say it’s a pack. The suit, the restaurant … and this little gift. It’s really a small thing so don’t get over-excited,” Ava said, trying to hide her discomfort.

Sara found it endearing, and took her hand to squeeze it shortly. Then, she opened the present, tearing apart the packaging. She could not wait any longer, so she peeked inside it.

Sara almost lost her breath. She thought her heart would leap out of her chest. She could not move. She tried to stop the tears from flowing but it was not working. Ava’s hand took hers, grounding her to the present.

“How did you know?”

“I have my ways.” Ava raised her brows and smirked.

In the box, a copy of the shark plush she had as a child laid perfectly. The one Laurel held on to when she died. The one that would forever be linked to Laurel’s spirit. The one that was lost after Laurel’s death. She took it in her hands, softening the fabric with the tip of her fingers.

“Thank you so much,” Sara said, the plush pressed against her heart as she got up to her feet to give Ava a hug. “It means the world to me.”

“You’re welcome, hun. It’s nothing really.”

“It’s everything.”

She put the plush back in the box when the dessert arrived. A single tiramisu with two spoons. She cracked a smile, remembering their first date.

“At least this one won’t go wasted,” Ava said playfully.

“It sure won’t,” Sara answered, picking up one of the spoons, taking a piece of the tiramisu, and presenting it to Ava, who opened her mouth and closed her eyes. Sara enjoyed the sight.

“God, this is so good. You gotta try now.”

And once, just for once, she let herself be fed by Ava, gladly returning the favor.

***

“My apartment in one piece and empty,” Ava said as she closed the door and lit up the room, relief evident in her tone.

“Good. I didn’t want to scold the children,” Sara said, moving closer to the biggest couch in the room.

Ava laughed. “Yeah. I was counting on Nora and Zari to play the adults.”

Just before seating on the couch, Sara turned around, watching Ava come closer to her.

“Thank you, Ava.”

“It was noth… “ Ava was immediately stopped by Sara’s index on her lips.

“Stop it. It’s amazing. It’s the best birthday I’ve ever had,” Sara said. “You’re the best gift I could have asked for.”

Sara’s heart pinched a little bit at the declaration. This evening had been perfect. Ava had lit her world up and had pulled her from the darkness. She had taken her heart and gardened it all year long, sheltering it from the glooming shadows of her past. She could not be more thankful at the end of this past year.

She closed her eyes and leaned into Ava’s light touch on her cheek. Ava’s eyes captured hers, conveying love through them. And soothing. Had she ever been as much at peace with herself than when she was with Ava? Probably not.

“No, you are,” Ava said.

Ava pushed her forehead against Sara’s and whispered again and again that she was the best gift she could ever ask for. Sara let herself be soothed by Ava’s voice and, without even noticing, as if they had done that their entire life, she joined her lips with Ava’s. And all the feelings of earlier that day came rushing in. But also the desire. Sara could feel her legs weakening under the touch of Ava’s hands. They were traveling all over her body, leaving goosebumps wherever they went.

Sara put her hand on the back of Ava’s neck and fell down backward, her back hitting the couch a second later. She cushioned Ava’s body with her own, never breaking the contact between them.

“I like where this is going,” Ava said, her hands gliding from Sara’s sides to her ass. “Gary’s gift says the truth, I cannot deny it.” She kept kissing Sara, then moved towards her neck, enjoying the skin on display.

Sara groaned. “Not fair. I wanted to do that. This suit had given me ideas all evening.”

“Love, I felt the same.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you guys so much for reading my story. I hope you liked it.  
> Don't hesitate to leave a comment, I looove them ♥  
> 


End file.
